Turning Disappointment Into Success

Well, Monday was weigh-in day and after all my planning and counting points and avoiding all the foods I absolutely love, I was UP .2lbs. UP!! Not even, not down which I really expected, but UP!! I know it was only .2lbs, that’s not much, but down .2 would have been huge. I had stepped up on that scale with such confidence; I just knew that I was going to see 1-2lbs down. I mean, I only had turkey, ham and a little broccoli casserole for Thanksgiving. I didn’t eat anything that I dearly loved. The stuffing, the noodles, the deviled eggs—the chocolate cake, I walked away from it all!! I was committed to losing this weight and I was going to be the example that if you eat smart and work hard that you can actually lose weight during the holidays. I failed. I was so disappointed in myself, I was humiliated that I had been so confident in this process and my confidence flew right out the window. It took all I had to fight the tears. I could hardly speak the rest of the night. I had decided that I was not ever going to lose weight and that it was the last time I was going to Weight Watchers.

Well, I got home, ate dinner (yes, I counted the points) and went upstairs and took a hot bath. As I lay there, I started thinking about all the times I had let my disappointment get the best of me. How I allowed disappointment to always strip a little bit of my confidence away, like I wasn’t worth whatever it was I was trying to obtain (relationships, jobs, weight, etc.). I allowed an emotion to control me and what I wanted to obtain. I allowed it. And right then I realized I was not going to ever allow an emotion to control me ever again. For me, sharing (blogging) about my weight-loss journey is therapeutic. I mean, what use would I be to anyone that reads my blog, if I gave up after gaining weight? How could I maybe help that one person that is struggling with the same thing? How would I ever be an example to my son if I gave up after every disappointment?

When Quinn strikes out one day, I will not tell him to quit the team because he was disappointed in the way he played. When Quinn doesn’t score that A that he studied so hard for, I won’t tell him to give up on learning. When Quinn’s heart is broken by his first love, I won’t tell him to ever give up on love. What I will tell him is that life is full of disappointment. That what we do with that disappointment is what makes us successful. Practice more, study more and love more. That is what I will tell him. Never give up. One of my favorite quotes is from Michael Jordan “I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” Success comes from never giving into your emotions”.

So I gained a little weight. The good thing is I didn’t gain a lot of weight. If I had of eaten all the foods that I dearly loved, I would have most definitely gained a lot more!! According to www.well.blogs.nytimes.com the average overweight person gains apx.5lbs during the holidays. If you take Thanksgiving week to New Years week, that is about 1lb per week. So, being up .2lbs is actually really amazing!! I am an overweight person, actually, I am considered obese, so not gaining that 1lb during Thanksgiving is really good. In the big scheme of things I was actually very successful. My overall weight-loss in 3 weeks is still 8.8lbs!!

So as we approach these upcoming holiday weeks and the holiday treats starting popping up at work and the cookies start being baked at home, I will allow myself to have a treat every now and then but I will continue to focus on a cleaner, healthier food intake. I will start focusing more on my daily activity and I will continue to log and blog. I encourage you to do the same. Focus on what you’re eating and what you’re doing. Replace that candybar with an apple and take a quick walk around the block, or head the mall and walk around. Every little bit will help. Here are a few suggestions that I will use these next few weeks and maybe they will help you too.

• Put your disappointment behind you and use what you learned to try to reach your goal next time.

• Recognize the things you accomplished during the experience, even if you see it as a failure. Remind yourself that your hard work paid off, even if it was not in the way you were expecting.

• Acknowledge your mistakes. Consider the reasons why you didn’t reach your goal, and make an effort to avoid the same mistakes in the future.

• Eliminate unrealistic goals. Sit down and reevaluate your wants and abilities, and formulate a goal that is challenging, rewarding, and attainable.

Just remember, you can’t be disappointed if you didn’t try.

And if you tried that means that you took an action to better yourself.

If you took an action that means that you have it in you

And if you have it in you then you can do it again

And if you do it again, you will succeed!!

No. More. Excuses!!!

  This morning my alarm went off at 5am, as it does most mornings, and I sent a text to my work out partner asking if she wanted to go to the gym. We went back and forth with maybe, do you, I dont know...finally, she said "let’s go". So we went!! Why do I hate going yet love it when I do. Why do I try to come up with any excuse possible to not go do what I must do to start this lifestyle change. I know that I am not alone. So many of us struggle with our weight and making the decision to lose it easy, doing something about it, not so easy. I hate being fat. I hate the clothes I am forced to wear. I hate the mirrors in my house. I hate the reflection of myself in the elevators and windows where I work. OK, maybe not hate. That’s a really strong word, but I really, really really don’t like it, yet I continue to eat high fat, high calorie foods, sit on my butt and gain weight. Not anymore!! I am tired of being tired. I am tired of making excuses. I am tired of being the person that I am not supposed to be!!

Here is a brief bio on me. I never struggled with weight. I was a 145lbs all through high school. I thought I was fat, haha, but I wasn’t. I was the ideal weight for my height. In 1989 I met a guy, married him a month later, and moved away from home. (That’s a whole other blog in itself!!LOL) I moved far away, like all the way to Florida away. I knew no one, I had no family or friends nearby and I was suddenly forced to prepare my own meals. Well, we ate meals at all times of the night (he was in the military and got home late most nights), we had high fat foods and lots of soda. I had no routine and that year I put on 50lbs. In the years to come I would gain another 50lbs and increase 5 pants sizes. In 2009 I made the decision to have weight loss surgery (WLS). I went with the Lapband and I just knew that this was going to be the answer to my weight loss. Well, 4 years later, I had lost 20lbs and was miserable due to a few complications. I had the band removed in 2013 and within 2 months put on 25lbs. Today, 11/7/13, at 264lbs, I weigh more than I ever have. I own 3 pairs of pants that I rotate out weekly and I am becoming someone I don’t even recognize anymore!

Today, 11/7/13, I am making the decision to not gain another pound. I am making the decision to do what I know has to be done to do to get this weight off. I know that it will not happen overnight (oh how I wish it would)and it will not happen in a month, but over the next few weeks, next few months the next few years, I plan on making healthier decisions. Being more active. Living life to its fullest. It will not be easy. I know this. I am a realist (most days) and I will make bad choices on occasion. What will be different is it will not be a daily thing. I will not ruin an entire day because of one bad meal. I use to use that old excuse, I already ruined my diet for the day so let’s go all out!! No more. That excuse is out the window!! I am making the commitment to exercise every day. Whether that is going to the gym, walking in the neighborhood, playing outside with my son. I will be active every day of the week. if its just 30 minutes, I will do something!! I am making the commitment to eat better and make smarter choices. I am starting Weight Watchers next week and look forward to sharing this journey with others that are on the same path as me. I am making the commitment to living life. The commitment to living MY life, to its fullest, to being what and WHO God intended me to be and enjoying every minute that I have.

I ask that you pray for me and for all those that are struggling with weight. We don’t want to be fat. We don’t want to be thin. We want to be healthy. I need to be healthy, for myself, for my husband and for my child. For my friends and family that count on me and need me. I want to live life and enjoy the years I have left on this earth. I start this journey today and I hope that you will start with me. No more excuses!! I can and will do this!!